You had me at Goon

For anyone looking to join me in the Rezza action, I've found this fantastic bungalow for rent:

Link: Sweet Ass Bungalow 
"Looking for a young heavy drinker that likes fun goon enthusiast MUST have a fantastic music taste aka no fucking popsters the house is pretty sweet massive back yard the bungalow is dope email or text me your likes and hates and I'll get back to you"

I like that the room amenities are specified as "Yard", and that you can be gay or straight, just so long as you're not in a relationship. This household is clearly all about the lifestyle.
I would love to know more about "Pet".


  1. Sorry my comment is refused because "4,096 characters" rule, so I pasted into word processor and counted 4,079 characters. Will have to paste paragraph by paragraph upside down. Hang on.

  2. Sorry the link to this advertisement no longer works. It sounds exactly like the house and bungalow my place backs onto! Oh wait, many Reservoir places would have a place like that over the back fence :)

    MINE had an elderly woman in the front house who may have been Grandmother or Mother to the kids who took over her house and bungalow. I tried making friends with her over the back fence when I moved here 4 years ago. She had 12 stray cats and some unruly tween-aged kids. The kids would play super hardcore techno in the “Yard” that I didn't mind so much except for the hardcore porn lyrics and the older girl beating up and screaming at the boys how they weren't dancing properly.

  3. I tried making conversation with the elderly lady and kids over the fence with a view to protecting my aviary that is positioned along that fence (after seeing them bash and scale my neighbours' fence in search of their tennis ball one day). I helped the elderly lady to fetch her stray cats back sometimes. She would shuffle around the block at dusk with non-symmetrical ugg boots and a bandage on her face calling for them. One day I saw her collapsed and confused at Reservoir train station being treated by paramedics. A neighbour said he once saw her being bashed by a man on the pavement, went to help, the man jumped in his car and drove off, she got up and ran inside. Don't interfere? She was only friendly over the back fence or at dusk in the side street. Whenever I passed her on the main street and smiled hello, she would go horror and hide in the nearest front garden.

    I haven't seen her the past year or more. In that time, the house has become slum like. Kids having all-night parties jumping on the roof of the bungalow, shed, and house; throwing bottles of bourbon/scotch/whatever, 2am transitions from rock/grunge back to hardcore/techno suggests the drugs they can afford actually work because the noise moves indoors and police cars are parked out the front in the morning. I enjoy the musicianship of band practice and particularly drum practice after midnight (hell, I play violin!), But it makes the neighbours on my side arc up. And my aviary is still positioned precariously against their fence.

    Also in this time, the stray cat population was replaced by the sound of a young large dog wheezing against its rope tether, followed soon after by dulcit tones of screaming newborn human. Again, my appreciation for band practice and smashing glass yelling parties that negate the sound of a screaming baby and changes the dog wheezing sound into a distressed yelping barking sound, just for a change.

    So could this be the “Yard”? What about the “Pet”?

  4. I had the pleasure of meeting “Pet” and “Random Friend Pet” one dull rainy morning en route to Reservoir train station. I recognised “Pet”. I also recognised the excitement of two riled up dogs, big bad ones, in the prime of their youth, in an en-fenced slum front yard. They snarled and attacked. Fortunate I carry a large bag and practice kickboxing! These dogs were onto me. I defended and thought about flowers but they wouldn't let me pass. But equally I couldn't miss that train. The thick traffic of High st didn't deter them. They circled into a lane of High st, noted my animal lover instinct concern, I lost. They chased a block to the shops and I got a bite in the inner thigh by “Random Friend Pet”.

    Calming down on the train, I wondered why no cars pulled up through this ordeal? They're proably from Epping or Thommo where dog atacks are commonplace? I phoned local council to report the incident because perceived risk to nearby childcare centre. Animal management gave me a missed call, I gave them a missed call, oh well.

    Since December the property seems to be abandoned. No more parties, no kids screaming, no dogs, not a peep. The grass in the front yard grows long around the abandoned prams, several wheelie bins, strewn rubbish and coverlets around the graffiti front concrete porch. Grass even grows where the Commodores would park.

    I wish I could attach a photo and invite people to move in :)

  5. It's probably about time that I mentioned I have an address for just such purposes.
    Feel free to share any pics you like. I can't promise to get you good neighbours, but I'm happy to take the piss out of the old ones.