On my way home tonight I stopped next to an ugg boot distributor at the traffic lights. I know this because that's what it said on the side of his van. I couldn't help having a look at him. I mean, who doesn't want to know what an ugg boot distributor looks like? It's like being in the hospital bed next to patient zero.
As I glanced casually across he was already staring at me, holding a tinny is his enormous fist. I smiled and gave a little jerk of my chin that I hoped would translate as "Ugg boots right?" and "How about that cricket?". He seemed unimpressed with me, or my car, or the general combination. I'm obviously still not ready for ugg boots.